Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
