Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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