You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I currently don't understand fingers.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
