I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize