I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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