Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You are a genius and a whore.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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