if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I touched a dick in church today
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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