Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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