It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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