I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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