I like my sex mixed with concussions.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize