in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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