two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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