two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
