I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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