Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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