Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
