I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
