so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
We are all done wearing pants today
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
