i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pop tarts are not kleenex
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize