I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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