This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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