covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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