I wanna bring you to show and tell
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
