I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
