bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
