and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I AM VODKA MAN
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
