How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
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Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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