It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
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Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
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We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
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