Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
The ass gains better be worth it
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