I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize