what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
