I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize