Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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