But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
When are your genitals available?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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