We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
