Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
