4 words: hood of his car
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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