whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Randomize
