hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize