It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he injected his testicle?
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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