I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
