I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
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He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
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No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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