Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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