Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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