im gay
i know
yea but for you.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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