Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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