I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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