She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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