I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize