So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
